Are Asian Women in Indonesia Really All Scammers?
We get a bunch of guys reporting various people as scammers. IndonesiaRomances has the most sophisticated anti-scammer technologies of any online dating site. And they're continually being improved and refined to always protect our members from the Internet Pests. So are all South East Asian women really trying to con foreign guys?
The quick simple answer is no, not at all. There are certainly scammers out there. There are a few areas where many guys are confused and wrongly mistake an online conversation as a scam. Culture and differing languages also come into play as well as misunderstanding the context of what's being talked about too. Let's clarify some of those now ...
Let's Start With the Fundamentals
Whether you're looking across our Dating Networks for a cute Thai women, honey-skinned filipino girl, sultry Vietnamese girl or a beach-bunny Indonesian women, these tips and insights about potential Asian women scammers apply to you.
Ever had a situation when someone else thought you were lying to them? But it turned out to be simple confusion with how you answered them, in the first place.
They understood your words differently to how you thought you were explaining them.
Well, welcome to the world of online text chats.
We Believe In the Same as You
- We do not tolerate scammers in our systems
- 99.9% of scammers entering our websites are deleted and banned before they even have the chance to send a message, thanks largely in part to our ever evolving automated technologies
- the remaining few are eventually trapped by member reporting
- we then automatically notify all members who the scammer contacted to further safeguard them, requesting them to immediately stop contact.
- NO OTHER ONLINE SITE does this to protect members.
- Scammers are a blight on the Internet
- We do not judge a person on their day job
- you can be unemployed, a brain surgeon, doctor, street sweeper, farmer, IT consultant, prostitute, freelancer, waitress, street food vendor, sex worker, artist or whatever. Your day job is irrelevant to us. It might be relevant to other members so good you complete this part of your online profile.
- Everyone deserves to find what and who they're looking for in life
Who Is a Scammer?
Those Typical West Africans
The image are real scammers that you should be imagining is one of bunch of the Nigerian guys huddled around in a small room, over many computers. The task each and every day for them is to entrap and snare innocent men and women, trying to extract money from them using deception and lies.
After many years of tracking IP addresses, we're continuing to buildup databases for locations of these Internet nasties.
There are also a lot of dishonest people who don't represent themselves honestly, in who they really are in their dating profile.
Some people in life just have negative agendas. Their dishonest motivations usually come to light when messaging other members who report them to us via the direct Admin Messaging System. We investigate and most are terminated and banned.
Fake profiles can sometimes also lead to dishonesty.
And sometimes they don't too. Some people are just looking for some random online chatting and will often try and create attraction but fake profiles so they can get their jollies. We also adhere to members using real photos that clearly show their faces.
We also have automated systems for detection of fake photos which are manually investigated.
There is no automated system that is 100% perfect. Ours are continually being refined to protect our members.
Some members who send unsavory, disrespectful messages are generally just pests.
They aren't scammers in the true sense.
Guys are generally at fault here too.
Don't send messages to women about your dick size or immediately start talking about sex. They simply don't like it. And they'll report you for it too. This becomes a Red Flag against your profile and a part of our deletion and banning investigations.
Treat other people and especially Asian women with respect, always.
Who Isn't a Scammer?
Most people actually. Well, the ones on our sites go through many automated scans so we're continually protecting you and them.
Yeah But What About Asian Women?
The majority of South-East Asia has cultures based around the male being dominant with the woman being the subservient, in a relationship.
This means their belief system is the man takes care of the woman. And this is where much confusion stems from for Western foreign guys. This 'take care' mentality includes, obviously, money.
You need to be careful that a few 'bad apples' doesn't destroy your faith in Asian Women, in general. Most will never ask a stranger for money.
Golden Rule #1: NEVER SEND ANYONE MONEY, ONLINE!
Don't fall prey to professional Asian girls using:-
- My phone is broken and I need a little money for repair to talk to you
- My mother is in hospital. I worry so much. Can you help a little?
- I can meet you when you come. But I don't have money for the plane ticket
- I can't talk Skype because I have an old phone
- I can only afford to talk in a Net Cafe because I don't own a phone
- there's many more but you get the idea
Golden Rule #1: NEVER SEND ANYONE MONEY, ONLINE!
These cases are the minority.
Report them to us and we'll investigate.
Honest people, from all walks of life
People get out what they put in. Being honest about who you are, who you're looking for and what you hope for in the person you're looking for will eventually reap you the rewards you are seeking.
Honesty goes a long way, online.
Honest conversation can be confusing when you're chatting with a person who doesn't speak your native language. The meaning and context of your words can be misunderstood. Their replies in your native tongue will almost always be the same since most of them understand the language poorly.
I've personally had many 30 minute chats with Asian women on just one answer from them that sounded a little 'off'.
It's very important to ask better questions. Ask shorter questions. Ask simple questions. And keep asking until you are satisfied the Asian women has understood what you are saying. And you're satisfied her reply has the context she had hoped to convey.
People advertising services openly are not scammers
We don't judge a person on what their day job is, remember.
Many people use a dating site to find people advertising these 'services' and that's OK too.
Our advice, if you're contacted and have no interest, is to use the 'Block' button on the person's profile.
While you might not be interested, they are other guys who are.
There's only so much we can do to stop duplicate profiles being created and we do our best.
Duplicate profiles don't mean the person is being dishonest.
People have multiple email addresses these days. People have email addresses they forget the password for. Some people create profiles years ago and don't remember they even have one. There are many reasons.
If they are running multiple profiles at the same time then that may be cause for suspicion and reporting to us via the Admin Messaging System for further investigation.
How Can You Protect Yourself?
We protect you here more than ANY other dating website. No question!
No system is infallible though. It's always better to understand the best ways to protect yourself online, just in case.
Don't give too much away in your profile
It's actually the best strategy to use short sentences and simple words and not too many of them, in your profile description.
Easy short sentences on separate lines makes it easy to read and invokes questions from the other person who is interested. Such as:
My name is John
I am a street sweeper. I live in London.
I like ferrets.
I love to eat watermelons on a rainy afternoon.
I would love to talk with an honest Asian lady.
Please say 'Hi' to me
Short, with some interesting areas for more conversations.
You want to initially avoid words that suggest you're some rich dude who owns half of New York. That's just inviting trouble. Great if you are but you're probably wanting to find someone who's interested in who and what you are. Don't set yourself up for a fall.
Send messages that lead to a reply. The easiest of all is a simple 'Hi, how are you'.
And we have many canned initial messages built right into our site.
Scroll down a list of profiles and you'll see them, ready for you to simply hit the 'Send' button. Quick and easy.
Ask lots of questions
Avoid moving off to an online messaging application too quickly. There's no harm at all in continuing your initial 'getting to know you' phase through our messaging system.
Ask plenty of questions of her.
It's good to have a list of them to ask, beforehand. This forms the basis of what you're looking for, anyway.
Meeting online is like real life
Remember when you met new people in real life, you tend to be cautious of who they are and look for warning signs? You want to make sure they are who they say they are?
You need to apply those same principles when meeting someone online. Obviously, you must maintain a level of enthusiasm for the other person so they don't think your some rigid stuck-up guy. If she's genuine, you want to keep her on the hook to take things to Stage 2 and beyond (hopefully).
Get to know the other person
Concentrate of getting to know people you're contacting online, first.
Avoid jumping to conclusions until you do.
If you don't understand what they're telling you or you're feeling a little lost, ask better questions until you do. The object of the game is finding who YOU like, not the other way around.
You're not here to become someone who you aren't so you can please someone else. That will turn into a fake relationship. Find someone who gels with you. You're here for you, not someone else.
- In getting to know someone, particularly dating an Asian woman, remember they are not going to be a native born speaker of your language.
- Their understanding of the language will be low and the context of what you say will be even lower.
- and it's the same in reverse too. What they will tell you is very likely to be confusing.
- don't give up. Learn to adjust and be patient.
You are not in any rush. Take your time.
Containing your initial chats within our website allows you many levels of protection as well as anonymity.
Consider the website as your initial protection level and a springboard for when you're ready to jump to another instant messaging service. But only when you are ready to do that, not someone else pushing you to do it.
Don't Give Email Addresses
Protect it and never give it to anyone, ever.
For starters, no-one uses email for starting a relationship online. Absolutely no-one.
Scammers harvest the Internet including online dating sites, to find likely candidates. Don't fall into their traps. Never give out your email addresses.
- People who are serious to find a partner want to jump directly into a faster mode of discovery. Online messaging applications are always the next step.
- popular free messaging apps across South East Asia are Line, Viber, WhatsApp and Zalo (Vietnam)
- Be aware that scammers tend to favour Facebook Messenger and Google Hangouts as they are easily able to create many fake accounts with these.
Keep Notes / Fact Check
Another great way to ensure the other person is who they say they are is to keep notes. You can do this easily with our site's Secret Notes. It's free to use for all members and located in the profile area of the person you're talking with.
Take short notes on important areas of your conversation. You can always ask specific question like their father's name, name of first pet and so on, for later checking, if you feel unsure about them.
Oh and you can 'Rate' the people you meet online too.
This is handy for when you need to start focusing on Asian women you're wanting to know more, for decisions.
Scammer Next Steps
If you think anyone you've contacted or has contacted you is a real scammer, then please do let us know via the direct Admin Message system.
Let us know the profile name as well as some details why you think they're trying to scam people. This helps our investigations progress with more speed.
If they're discovered as scamming people, you'll see an automated Admin message in your Inbox that they've been deleted. This is an automated message sent to all members that have been contacted by this person, to better protect others.
So your Admin Scam Report is a service to others.
Wrap Up on Asian Women?
Golden Rule #1: NEVER SEND ANYONE MONEY, ONLINE!
There are dramatic differences with Asian and Western cultures, especially concerning money. Don't confuse honest intention with dishonest behavior.
After so many years, running multiple South East Asian dating sites, our belief is the vast majority of real Asian women are honest people. They're seeking the same as you, if they can find it.
But they're sometimes also from very poor economic situations.
We're doing our best to protect you, always.
Protect yourself and you'll find who you are looking for.
This article was posted on ThaiRomances' Blog.
Last updated: January 29, 2021
Hi, my name is Martin. I have many friends in and traveled throughout the Asia/Pacific regions for the past 17 years. I am passionate in helping others with my insight and past adventures.
I hope you enjoy the stories I write and take a little something away from them. I've contributed to over 160 posts on travel, dating, marriage and relationships.